Once Again, walking...

Just woke up about an hour ago.
I've been asleep for nine days and let me tell you, I'm rested!
That's the last time I stay up for a month with out any sleep!
But over my long, long nap I discovered that my life will go on.
And on.
And on.
Owen's won't, if I die I'll come back, he won't.
He should be with who he wants to be while he can.
I shouldn't be angry or sad, because if he's happy I'm happy.

Silence...

I see Owen, he's with Tosh.
I take a deep breath and approach them with Gwen.
I need to focus on work, I can't let my emotions distract me.
I say hello, trying to be casual.
But I can't look up.
My eyes are on the ground.
I can't risk losing myself in emotions.
I'm just going to have to except the fact he's gone.
But yet he is right in front of me!
My emotions keep clouding my mind.
I am silent for the rest of the day.

No More Running...

After discovering about Tosh and Owen I don't know what to think.
Gwen let me spend the night at her place, but I just feel empty.
I shouldn't have left, I know that now.
I need to learn not to run from my problems, and to face them head on.
If I had only stayed none of this would have happened.
But I ran.
I ran from my problems.
And now I've returned.
With even more to face.
There will be no more running.
I'm back, and I'm back to stay.

Walking...

I don't know what to think.
I screwed everything up, literally everything.
I had my chance and blew it.
So now I'm walking, as I always do.
Getting my mind together, collecting all of my thoughts.
It's been about a month now.
And yes I knew about Gray.
I knew he came back, but I didn't know what to do.
So I went walking, and then my walking turned into running.
And before I knew it I had disappeared.
But it was the only thing I knew how to do.
Disappearing is hereditary for me.
You could be considered lucky if I even came back.
But I have come back.
And now I'm walking once again.
Wondering why it hurts so much, that I'm the one who is walking while the rest of the Earth just sits there and watches.
But truly I'm the watcher, I stand still as I watch every single person I meets life go by.
I watch them grow.
I watch them live.
And I watch them die.
Because that's all I can do.
So I walk.
Forever, as the Earth just keeps turning, like nothing at all is wrong.